YOU! That’s right, you, with the itty bitty package. Just step away from the bar and come over here. I’m holding penis inspection tonight and you haven’t been measured yet. I know you haven’t, I don’t see your hand stamp. THAT hand stamp tells me you are over 21 and paid the cover charge, it says nothing about whether you are packing a useless tiny little wee willie in your pants. Small penis deception disappoints and angers more women every year than any other man related problem. So, drop your trousers and lets get on with this, shall we? What, you’re offended? You think this is humiliating? Well, I’m certainly getting the mini dick vibe off you now! Males with big cocks, real men, aren’t afraid to whip their meat out and show it to a woman. You’re squirming like a itty bitty bug under a great big microscope. What are you afraid of? I’ve seen plenty of man meat, don’t worry about that! So, show me. You aren’t getting back to the bar, or out of here now, without having it measured for the sake of all the women you might meet tonight. I don’t care if you think this is crazy or not, I’m not the only one in the bars now, doing this. Pretty soon there is going to be eensy weensy peensy inspectors in all places where men try to pick up women, she’ll be able to ask for his stamp to know if he’s worth her time. Oh, that offends you? Women love the size of your dick? You can tell those phone sex operators anything you want, loser. But you men can tell at a glance if a women has what you like, big tits, nice ass, plush lips. But until now, these poor girls end up with guys who lead them on, date them, act charming and fun and then on the big night, she’s expecting fireworks and she gets a damp fizzling firecracker. The tiny little blue and white ones. Yeah. So when a woman is thinking she’s going to have a gourmet meal and she ends up with a cock mcnugget, it pisses her off AND it leaves her sexually frustrated. AND she has to deal with the deceitful little fucknut whining about wanting to get his little stubby chubby off. As if any woman wants to deal with something that insignificant at any point in her life. He should have the decency to just stay home and masturbate alone.
This is the new order of business, buddy boy. Now drop them or the two ladies here will restrain you and I’ll reach in and measure it myself. Grab him girls!!! Now, lets get that belt off – STOP SQUIRMING- and those pants down, you’re attracting quite the crowd of onlookers with your yelling, bubba. All these girls are going to see your -WHOA!! Oh yeah, that’s an itty bitty all right, it can’t be more than three inches at most. Stamp his hand “T” for Tiny, ladies, and I’m going to stamp his little dickie too, for all the trouble he’s given me tonight, in bright blue ink. I hope your balls are the same color after a while, because soon every woman in the city will know better than to give you even the hope of a fuck!! So long, shortie!!
Coming soon to YOUR local bar:)
Miss Tara
Cock Radio
My “cock” isn’t even 2 inches. And hasn’t had an erection in over a year to be that big. Viagra doesn’t help either. To be honest, I don’t think my “cock” is even 1 inch flaccid as it is. And I believe less tan 1/2 inch in diameter. My little toe is just as big. I don’t imagine any bigger tan when I was born. It is even embarrassing to try to pee standing up at a urinal. Not even enough tere to extent through my zipper. So all my life, I ave mainly sat to piss. Needless to say, every woman has laughed when they saw it. At one time it hurt. But I actually love being giggled at, laughed at, humiliated and degraded. Hey, once the truth of the matter is open and obvious, it’s better to laugh along than try to deny it. Masturbation? Forget it. Nothing tere to stroke, though a vibrator works.